Abyssal Gatekeeper, common (first printed in Weatherlight, 1997)

As with all forbidding walls and stalwarts, Abyssal Gatekeeper is most useful when you have more than one opponent with which to contend, proving an effective deterrent which promises mutually-assured destruction, if you will. (For the nuclear option, see False Prophet.) Coupled with some useful means of sacrifice (Phyrexian Tower?) the Gatekeeper may act as a pseudo-unblockable creature and remain a dire warning to your enemies even when tapped. The Gate doesn't stay locked for every threat you will face, since many cards in the multiplayer environment come with quirks like supertrample, protection from black or sufficient size to require more than one blocker, but thankfully those creatures tend to appear at a much later stage than this small wonder. A player may pair this card with a supply of Unearths to frustrate his or her opponents with a corruptive stream of attrition, (and the cherry on top of this one is that the card Attrition itself fits perfectly into the theme) and when the graveyards are suitably full of the sacrificed, Mortivore may come out to play, perhaps Spoils of Evil or Songs of the Damned may enable some of the more shamelessly evil planeswalkers to cast a giant Drain Life or Death Cloud... it is more true of black than any other colour in magic, that when a black mage appears to be stalling, it is often to reach some threshold at which they can cast their most powerful and inevitably crushing spells - think Nightmare, Corrupt, Mind Sludge, et al. Playing an early Abyssal Gatekeeper is just one of the affordable ways to survive those grueling early turns. If you want this effect to be more of a surprise, consider Innocent Blood. Can be acquired for less than ten pence a copy.

Abundance, rare (first printed in Urza's Saga, 1998)

It's difficult to estimate how powerful Abundance is as a permanent in a vacuum but it seems a slight improvement of one's topdecking luck should not be worth four mana unless it shares a card with a creature or disruptive spell - any normal deck with a heavy green element will be more interested in casting, say, Ravenous Baloth, or else Creeping Mold, or in any case something that grabs the opponent's attention. Abundance does none of that, making its inclusion in a traditional green creature deck unlikely. In a slower environment, the fourth turn can be very important indeed, not to be wasted on an opulant card like this. Still, it has homes in other types of decks... imagine Abundance allowing a player friendly with the Enchantresses - Argothian Enchantress, Enchantress's Presence, and so forth - dig for an enchantment each time one is cast, unleashing a daisy chain of blessings, each cementing the player's defenses that little more inevitably, in preparation for the moment when Opalescense finally climbs its way to the top of the deck. Add the card Sylvan Library and you'll note that the two cards are written in such a way as to provide an absurd effect in conjuction, that of drawing three cards a turn for no cost at all! With Stasis in play, allow yourself to draw a land every turn; with Orcish Mechanics in play, skew the odds in the favour of drawing an artifact. Besides Abundance's talent for dowsing for just what you need, it does one other, more subtle thing: with no cards left in one's library, an activation of Abundance to replace one's draw allows one to survive the draw step where loss otherwise looms. This is a very specialist card, plain in most circumstances but a cornucopia in those small, subtle moments. Can be acquired for about fifty pence a copy.

Abuna's Chant, common (first printed in Fifth Dawn, 2004)

This card costs a fortune and has precious little effect to show. Why bring Abuna's Chant, when at four mana, white has access to more powerful abilities like full prevention - Story Circle - or even redirection of damage - Harsh Judgement, Kor Chant, Mirror Strike? Is five life worth the card's inconvenience? At full power, no card fully obsoletes Abuna's Chant's combination of abilities but I don't imagine that makes it an attractive card to anyone in particular. Mostly unplayable. Can be acquired for less than ten pence a copy.

Abu Ja'far, uncommon (first printed in Arabian Nights, 1994)

The consumate cowardly card. What better way to shriek "please don't hit me!" on the very first turn? Sadly, it's a ploy that rarely works - unadjusted, this shrinking leper can only block one foot soldier and will never survive the experience. Examined from this perspective, Abu fails to live up to his potential and compares unconvincingly to the gamut of one-mana removal spells through Magic's history, every single one of which having more surprise value. It is only through combination with trickier cards that he shines. To start with, Blaze of Glory and Lure are two popular ways to throw a combat into chaos, and with Abu Ja'far as your avatar, means the decimation of all involved. With his power augmented by some equipping or crusading (although should you place Abu and Jihad in the same deck be aware of the potentially off-color observations your opponents could voice, on the theme of Arabian guerrilla-terror types, I dare say. One may as well drive the point home by adding Alaborn Zealot, a similar card.) effect, the leper's ability often amounts to unblockability, much to your opponent's chagrin at being harried by a card never intended to threaten his life. Back to the cowardly end of the strategic spectrum, their exists a card named Proclamation of Rebirth which can serve to resurrect Abu as many times as you wish - exactly the thing to quell attack by hordes of dumb beasts although ill-suited against those with trample or fear. Not a "good" card exactly, but an amusing one - in victory, how satisfying would it be to claim your opponent was outsmarted by your leper general? Can be acquired for around three pounds a copy in a black border, or much more readily in white for less than ten pence each.

Absorb Vis, common (first printed in Conflux, 2009)

In slower paced environments, cards such as Absorb Vis blossom. Its individual effects - a four-point Drain Life or else an uncounterable Lay of the Land - both cost at least one point of mana too much to be deemed optimal by those tourney lords who have somehow come to oversee the pronouncement of viability in cards, effortlessly painting how tournaments unfold with nary a paragraph of proof required from their devotees. Still, in conjunction, Absorb Vis gives a player a certain amount of freedom. It's important in the design of this type of card to allow one effect of the two to always be useful - this one can serve both as your killing blow and as a key to the means of casting it, and for that it has my confidence, no matter how slow it seems. Would that this type of card become popular with more players, perhaps the standard magic duel wouldn't be quite so coloured by "officially good!", one-dimensional, boring cards. Of course, judging by the way the Wizards of the Coast see fit to print cards specifically intended to ring true with the competitive set, cards that artificially cost a little extra will continue to be crowded out by card that artificially cost a little less. Well, it's one way to run a business, I suppose. This card has lots of cousins - for real overkill value, play it with Soul Spike or Spinning Darkness and watch as Absorb Vis takes on a third role in your deck! Can be acquired for less than ten pence a copy.

Absorb, rare (first printed in Invasion, 2000)

Is Absorb good? Following a brief time's deliberation I have decided that it is quite lacklustre. The combination of the spell's abilities suggests a slow controlling deck, but with an awkward mana cost, Absorb poses problems for the permission-minded planeswalkers, both early and late in the game. Firstly, its very specific mana cost is an obstacle to prompt play, that extra coloured mana symbol over Counterspell's cost hanging over the gaps in your curve you may have wished to be left free to play Brainstorm or to feign Disrupt. Multiple copies of Absorb make a hand feel overstuffed, and even during the later portion of the game, during a war of counterspells, you may find yourself running out of mana before you do responses. In a library configured with an elaborate mana base to facilitate Absorb's casting, the card merely mollifies the damage you have likely already dealt yourself simply by using your own lands. To highlight Absorb's incredible awkwardness further, consider that it is not even the best counterspell variant that costs three mana - look to Forbid as a powerhouse, or else Dissipate's ability to trump certain game plans (and for the diplomatic, many-players-at-a-table types, consider Vex as a strong compromising card - although while chronicling my thought on this card I have tried to take the dim, competitive view which renders cards such as Vex a laughing stock.) Recent tournament environments have diminished the power of the counterspell to the point where Cryptic Command - certainly a card that suffers from the same complaints as Absorb - starts to look good, but in the lifespan of magic there lie sufficient permission spells - Mana Drain, Force of Will, Disrupt, Counterspell itself - to ensure no planeswalker ever really needs to come to battle with this one memorised. Can be acquired for about two pounds a copy.

Absolver Thrull, common (first printed in Dissension, 2006)

I remember Thrulls from sets much older than this and they were black to a man, but at least their willingness to die for a cause has not been diminished. I'm unsure into what deck this card fits well - an aggressive deck that fears cards such as The Abyss or Solitary Confinement but wants to pressure the opponent every turn may require something from this family but never really Absolver Thrull in particular, since there are variants more suited to attacking - contrast him with Cloudchaser Eagle or Soltari Visionary. Including this card in your library largely means abstaining from using enchantments of your own or keeping this creature back in your hand for fear of sabotaging yourself. Finally among his weaknesses, you'll note that he belongs to that class of card which Humility makes look particularly foolish. In the Absolver's defense, however, the combination of his abilities puts him in a not totally obsolete position - if you choose to sacrifice him through some manner of card ability (Diamond Valley, Mask of the Mimic) or simply use him as cannon fodder against fierce attack, his role in the game has not yet ended - whether that is enough for him to be viable is up to the individual deck builder. Other marginal bonuses come from his popular Cleric creature type, although Monk Realist is similarly of the cloth and slots much more easily into many decks. There are a great deal of white cards which can disenchant and most have less strings attached. Can be acquired for less than ten pence a copy.

Absolute Law, uncommon (first printed in Urza's Saga, 1998)

A very straightforward card that ensures your aggressive red opponent can neither block your creatures or snuff out their lives with fireworks. Also protects you admirably from lesser-seen effect such as Threaten and makes your artifact creatures untargetable by Shatter variants. This mostly just turns such a duel into a lopsided race, which is often what red wants to do in any case - don't be surprised if your opponent simply employs his fireworks as one constant barrage of direct damage to you. It's hard for red to come back from such a comprehensive hate-card when it turns off their favourite methods of clawing back losts cards - Flametongue Kavu, Pyroclasm - but bear in mind the crazier side of red - Ball Lightning, Goblin Grenade, Arc-Slogger - remain as menacing as ever. Can be acquired for less than twenty pence a copy.

Absolute Grace, uncommon (first printed in Urza's Saga, 1998)

Of these two "Absolute" enchantments, Grace is the weaker. Protection from black notably fails to defend against forced sacrifice - Barter in Blood - or black's vision of global destruction - Damnation, Mutilate. Given that Absolute Grace grants its protection to every creature in play rather than just those ones under your control, it's frustrating to find cards that combine with it - cards like Pestilence suggest themselves as happy partners, at least until one reads the card a second time. So what's the card for? Well, for facing down aggressive black decks, of course, all the while wishing it were Light of Day instead. Can be acquired for less than twenty pence a copy.

About Face, common (first printed in Urza's Legacy, 1999)

The creative department of the Wizards of the Coast team have had many successes, but the title of this card is not among them - About Face's mechanical relevance to its name doesn't withstand the barest scrutiny. Certainly we'd all be much happier if they left the military terminology to the military. That gripe aside, About Face is a powerful card in certain contexts, easy to misjudge. In a deck full of stalwart defensive creatures like Indomitable Ancients, Dream Stalker and Martyrs of Korlis, About Face trumps both Giant Growth and Berserk in terms of explosive efficiency. Of course, a bottom-heavy deck like that would have trouble sustaining an offensive line, but sometimes you'll only need a single copy of About Face to win - consider the popular combination with Tireless Tribe! A veritable wipeout occurs when those cards converge, and they can do so with haste, even quicker than the Hatred decks of old. About Face is also employable, rarely, as a removal spell, and although many people refuse to play walls so as to improve some overstated, theoretical "topdeck" ratio in their library, remember that About Face can also dispatch of Birds of Paradise, Noble Hierarch and Doran, the Siege Tower. Not for everyone, and if you find yourself building a deck to support it, weigh the merits of About Face's surprise factor against Dwarven Thaumaturgist's tenacity. Can be acquired for less than ten pence a copy.

Aboshan's Desire, common (first printed in Odyssey, 2001)

Desiring privacy yet attempting to manipulate people out of theirs, Desire transforms one of your creatures into Big Brother, the inevitable, immortal lidless eye. Best on creatures that are serving some static ability (Meddling Mage) but which have no aptitude for combat, Aboshan's Desire teaches your jailors to be executioners. As with all effects that grant some sort of protection or evasion, your opponent may find some way to "shoot you down" at inopportune times, and wipeouts await. If this isn't enough of a boost for you, consider Zephid's Embrace. Can be acquired for less than ten pence a copy.

Aboshan, Cephalid Emperor, rare (first printed in Odyssey, 2001)

Octopuses are fascinating things to read about, I find. They have the ability to use very simple tools and think ahead - the Cephalids of the magic universe translate this facilities into political machination, that most dull of pursuits. They can grow to giant sizes, something not copied by Cephalids - 3/3 is the extent of their floppy frames. Now, there are all manner of spells capable of dispatching a 3/3 creature and most of them cost a great deal less than six mana, but happily, Aboshan suits heavy blue decks, the colour of Confound and Misdirection... and if you can protect him well, the Cephalid General can take a balanced game and throw it in your favour with close to unreasonable power. With him and a modest army, you can disable the majority of your opponent's land and Disrupt or Mana Leak anything they can still afford. Aboshan can both anull your opponent's defence and deliver the killing blow himself. During Odyssey block, his court was mostly made up of other lazy cephalopods who already wanted to tap, but new retainers Mothdust and Ameboid Changeling are both prompt and useless enough on their own to be happy to have something to do... Can be acquired for less than twenty pence a copy.